"Not surprisingly, Olaf Crushersson was judged by an expert to be the largest Elf ever to live. On the other hand, it was surprising to find that same expert two weeks later, lost in Olaf's bellybutton."
"Olaf's parents wanted him to be a sorcerer like others in his family. However, his career was cut short when he changed one of his magic professors into a banana cream pie, which then went missing."
"For all his size and terrible crimes, Olaf has always been an avid bird watcher. And while it's also true that he ate many of those birds, some say that this was a good sign."